Releasing the Valve

Oh man. What a morning.

I genuinely didn’t know where my head was at today. It was all over the place. I wasn’t feeling the gym. I wasn’t feeling the rower. I wasn’t feeling anything.

I did that thing where you’re not doing anything, but you’re also not resting. Up and down the stairs. Round and round the house. Looking out the window. Rain. Wind. Sit in front of the TV for a bit. Make a cup of tea. Walk again. Another cup of tea. More pacing.

I even told Coach GPT I wasn’t going to train today, that I’d just go for a walk, but I was talking myself out of that as well. The truth is, I knew I needed to do something.

And then the voices started. The men in my head.

“What’s the point?”
“What’s the point of any of this exercise stuff?”
“You’re not getting anywhere.”
“Just go back and watch TV.”

I battled it and battled it. Right up to the point where I was pulling my gear out of the wardrobe. Shorts on — still fighting it. T-shirt on — still fighting it. Shoes on — still fighting it.

Then I went out to the shed, sat on the rower, and started.

I did 15 minutes, and every five minutes I got faster. By the last five I was holding sub-1:57 pace.

Then I stopped and did two 250m sprints , pretty much flat out, but controlled. Controlled frustration release. Controlled anger release. The kind where you’re emptying the pressure without blowing up.

It didn’t solve everything. I still feel like there’s a lot going on and a lot to do. But it released the valve.

And I am genuinely grateful I have a rower in the shed, because if I’d had to get in the car and drive to the gym this morning, I don’t think it would have happened at all.

This is The Sub-7 Experiment — as much for mental health as physical health.